We Asked Real Couples: ‘What Should You Do As Soon As You’re Engaged?’


Photo by Sonia Tapia, Enchanted Bliss


Just ask any of the wonderful couples who shared their engagement stories with us for our “Real Engagements”, and you’ll see engagements are ridiculously happy, but sometimes overwhelming, times for all. And, for lots of couples, the biggest worry is where to start? What should you do the second you get engaged?

We asked some of our recent “Real Weddings” couples—otherwise known as folks who’ve been where you are and made it to the other side—for their number one piece of advice to recently engaged couples. The answers may surprise you!


1. Be on the Same Page

“Discuss with your partner what you want in a wedding,” said Valarie, who wed Heather in North Carolina in Sept. 2015.

“If you’re wanting a huge party, but your partner is wanting something more intimate, you need to know that. Being on the same page about your wedding will help everything go more smoothly.”


2. Remember It’s About Your Love

“First and foremost, celebrate your engagement with your loved ones,” January advised. He and his husband Danni were married in California Dec. 2015.

“Secondly, discuss what type of wedding you both want but always remember that your wedding is a celebration of your love, whether you choose to make it simple, timeless or avant-garde.”


3. Enjoy Your Secret

“Give yourselves a little time to enjoy the excitement between just the two of you,” Ashleigh said. She and her wife Erika married in Maryland Sept. 2015.  

“As soon as you announce it, you’ll be inundated with the when, wheres, and ‘am I invited?’ questions and you go into planning mode. Having even just a few hours to share this uber-romantic secret is really nice.”

When you’ve thought about your vision for your wedding, and you’re ready to roll up your sleeves, we’ve got you covered. From tools to help you create (and stick to) a budget, to loads upon loads of LGBTQ wedding inspiration to a huge directory of vendors who serve same-sex couples, check this out for great tips.

Although I've spent the last decade riffing on everything from suburban politics to race in media, documenting love stories as content manager of GayWeddings.com definitely takes the cake. A proud alumna of Howard University's journalism program, I've written for Parents.com, The Huffington Post, xoJane and Essence magazine. When I'm not writing, I'm debating the merits of Drake, obsessing over frozen yogurt or plotting my next international adventure. I want to feature you on GayWeddings.com! Always feel free to drop me a line at community [at] gayweddings.com to share your engagement, wedding and love stories.