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Tik Tok: A Primer in Time Management

It’s all about money these days, even when you’re planning a wedding. At a time when most couples, gay or straight, are both working, it’s also about time management. Gone are the days when your typical twosome pulled out their checkbook and one person (usually the wife) spent her days only planning the fabulous nuptials.

Brit and Kathy, as many of you know, both work, and they’re on a wedding budget of approximately $35,000. If they lived in Noman Land, Missouri, that might be easy. But they live in New York City, one of the most expensive places to throw a wedding. In addition to their guest count of approximately 130, and their location at Chelsea Piers, they’re having a complete wedding party and all the other fixin’s.

Between finances and figuring out all the coordinating, you’d think these two would be in strait jackets. Just the opposite: Kathy is doing most of the planning and organizing, and, talking to her, she seems calm and collected. When I asked her how last week went, she replied “We took a break to celebrate my maid of honor and best friend’s birthday.” Not only is taking a break from your wedding vital to keep your sanity, but it’s excruciatingly important to acknowledge wedding-party members; never forget a birthday or other major event in any of your bridal party’s lives.

Not that the couple have neglected anything. Since we last chatted, they did the bridesmaids’

fittings, confirmed the florist, and got the feather arrangements. The save-the-date cards have

been printed and ordered, and Kathy’s hard at work on their web site. At the Designer Loft fitting, the couple had a private room (with mimosas, natch), and Brit’s mom even tried on gowns. They decided on Weddings by Linda’s Florist for their flowers, and signed on the dotted line. Their feather centerpieces are being done by Feather Centerpiece, and are a smart way of cutting down on the budget.

Remember, alternatives to flowers can save you a bundle. You don’t have to cut the blooms out completely, but you can find less-expensive ways to create or expand centerpieces and the space. Candles are great, but know that they are sometimes just as expensive as flowers.

In the meantime, Kathy’s booked rooms at Fashion 26 Hotel and Maritime, which are both in Chelsea, near the wedding site. Oh yeah, and Kathy sends out updates to all her bridal-party members, just so they know what’s next on the schedule, and as a reminder of important dates. Kathy said she got great group rates from the hotels, another reminder to always call hotels as far in advance as possible and ask them about package deals. You’d be surprised at how many places will welcome you with great prices and a smile.

The key to wedding planning is organization, of course. Everyone has a different method to

their madness, so I asked Danielle Bobish, of the Wedding Planning Company Curtain Up Events for some pointers. “A great way to keep organized is to make a timeline/ checklist of your priorities,” she says. “There are a lot of great examples online that you can use. Another idea is to make a master book with all of your vendor contracts, contacts, and any other pertinent info. Give the book to someone you trust on the day of.”

And remember what Kathy and Brit are learning: It’s supposed to be fun!

Scaling down the Holidays

Now’s the season when most American overeat, and wedding planning is not likely to help. Busy schedules and parties, in addition to your appointments, are one big temptation test. To fight the battle of the bulge, I asked Joey Gonzalez, COO of Barry’s Bootcamp, to give some bride/bride, groom/groom seasonal advice.

“Remember to avoid the following food groups: Sugar, bad carbs (processed and refined), and fat. If you need a treat, pick one of these three only. Also, weddings are about love, and that includes great sex. So take a good hard look at your naked self every night before bed. That should incentivize you for that honeymoon romance!” I’d pay attention to Gonzalez; he might just make you drop down and give him 50 if you misbehave!

David Toussaint is the author of the Gay Couple's Guide to Wedding Planning, Gay and Lesbian Weddings: Planning the Perfect Same-Sex Ceremony, and TOUSSAINT!.