Kim & Amanda
Amanda and I recently got married in York, Pennsylvania. I had asked my parents if we could use their house as the location for the ceremony and reception. They were totally ecstatic about the idea and my mom got right to work telling my dad about all the overdue exterior work that needed to be done on the house.
Amanda and I went through our guest list and found ourselves inviting people out of the pure thought process of, “this person could use a wake-up call” about all that life entails in this world.
Some people would say that is a stupid reason to invite someone to your lesbian wedding, but I beg to differ. Obviously we are not going to invite anyone who is going to show up with a screaming Jesus mob behind them! However, we did end up inviting quite a few people we were unsure would even show up. Why?
Every time I am asked the question. “why are you a lesbian/ why do you like girls?” I simply answer, “why not? or why do YOU like girls? (if a man is asking)” Then I immediately follow that comment up with “why? what do you want to know? Go ahead and ask, it’s ok.”
I have watched too many LGBT individuals immediately resort to putting their guard up when people question them and their lifestyle. This is NOT going to change anything! Whether the person is a little aggressive about it or just asking questions to ask them, I have always had a positive reaction to being straight-up informative about the LGBT community.
How does our community plan on moving forward when the LGBT community reacts with aggression, attitude or just blowing people off? Every time I watch someone representing our community blow up in a political or social debate on TV, I want to throw up; and many times it is the straight LGBT ally that comes to save the day with a calm and collect answer. The importance of keeping our cool and informing in a calm and matter of fact sort of way IS worth our while and patience. Why should WE accommodate such close minded individuals?? Because what we have to offer is the knowledge to open the mind to see YOU for who you are and therefore offering alternative thinking to that individual.
Now, this does not mean that we should all allow people to put us down or challenge our preference; but, more allow people to know you as a person who is patient, open and kind.
The point is, that my partner and I share these same views and have found ourselves in the midst of men who initially were looking for a threesome to now respecting our relationship and us as individuals. We have also exercised our patience and knowledge in the midst of the most radical religious person as well; the result: a cordial relationship where this person no longer feels it necessary to force their beliefs on two, already kind hearted, individuals.
Opening ourselves to these opportunities allowed us to invite people from many different walks of life to our ceremony! And what did people think about this small town York lesbian wedding?? Every time I looked over at someone they were crying out of joy or laughing and mingling with our many guests! A day of success in our eyes, and another day where people were exposed to something, truly, progressive and life changing.
This story goes out to my Parents, Brother and Sister-in-Law for all their dedication to our beautiful day!
Love InspirationPeople need to be informed, period.
Fast FactsFirst met: At work: June 2005
First date: October 2005
Got engaged: December 25, 2007
Ceremony location: York, PA
Favorite planning resource: US!!
Honeymoon destination: No Honeymoon: but soon!
In Case You Were WonderingWe're calling our celebration: N/A
Our wedding colors: Red, White, Sand, Black
We will be wearing: Corset top & Pants / Dress
Who proposed to who: Kim proposed to Amanda: "will you marry me" engraved on ipod
Our last name will be: Keeping our last names, but possible hyphenate later.
Looking Back on the Big DayFavorite wedding moment: Our Fathers' speeches.
First Dance song: I Will Stay With You: John Legend