Can I see inside your box?!
Most people say something geeky and akward on their first date, but I do believe I have the market cornered on this.
Shelley and I had spent the past two previous nights nonstop on the phone with one another. Every time we would approach a topic of conversation that should be reserved for discussion at a later time (like maybe after our first date), we would file it away.
Eventually, we just started saying "let's put that one in the box!"
Well everything was going great on our first date. We were getting along quite well. We played video games (she rocks at dance dance revolution by the way), had dinner at Hodads (a fun burger joint), and even saw a movie. It was turning into a very memorable night.
We got back to my friends apartment (where I was house sitting that week) and just couldn't find a way to end this date. Both of us were using every excuse in the book.
Then really quickly she said "I had a really great time." And then maybe because I was so nervous or because I am a little dorkish, I try what I think is a very suave move. I leaned against the doorframe, put on my best smile, and hear myself say "So, when do I get to see inside your box?"
And just like that we were both stunned to silence. Me, because I realize that I sounded like a sleazy guy hitting on some girl at a bar after he's had one to many. Her, probably for the same reason. It was meant so innocently! I couldn't believe I had just said that. Thank God, she started laughing. I turned red from head to toe and was utterly convinced that in one sentence I had killed any chance I had with her.
So with my head down, my heart beating rapidly, with what little dignity I had left I said, "You're not gonna call me again are you?"
She walked right up to me and kissed me. She said, "I'll call you tonight" and left. Three years later, I am still saying some very dorky things at the wrong moment, but she never seems to mind. She still just kisses me and walks away.
We moved in together about a year and half after that very “interesting” first date. You could say that I knew anyone who could get past my geeky akwardness had to be the one.
I had actually been holding on to the ring since our third month of dating and twice I had seen her open the drawer where I had hid the box looking for something or another. Lucky for me sometimes she is just oblivious to certain things.
The only reason I had not yet proposed was because I was bound and determined to do it right. You see, I read somewhere that 76% of women did not find their proposals romantic. I wanted to be in the other 24%.
I am not sure I succeeded but if you ask Shelley, she will say that it was cute (another word for awkward), and that it really fit us. As you know, when I get nervous, I say some really dumb things.
Since our engagement over a year ago things have been sailing smoothly along. Our guest list has changed at least six times, and went up from 50 to 90+ people. We have gone from an orchestra, a barbershop quartet, to a typical D.J. We did attempt to theme our ceremony but could never quite make up our minds.
Our list of ideas we threw out included The Deck of the Enterprise (blame that one on Shelley), Sex In The City where everyone dresses trashy chic and we all drink cosmos (but that reminded us of dinner parties at Kevin and Mikes), a country wedding with a big red boot behind the reverend who will sing our ceremony (yeah maybe not), and a lot of other fun ideas. In the end we just stayed with a simple elegance idea.
As you can guess Shelley banned me from making any kind of a speech, and did not even let me say "I love you more than Honey Nut Cheerios" in our vows, has clearly stated that the song "Too Much Booty" is apparently not an acceptable first dance song, but did allow me to make the entire bridal party dance to the Time Warp song.
One of our friends asked us the other day how we make it work. Well Shelley is a Buffy loving, comic book reading, sci-fi/horror, movie enthusiast with a penchant for car shows and musicals. I'm a conservative, somewhat liberal minded, set in her ways, country music loving, bad dancing, sims addicted, corona logo obsessed, technologically inclined gal.
You add all that up and include love, and somehow it just works.
Due to the legality of gay marriage in California (FINALLY!!) shelley and I on our anniversary this september will be redoing our vows with some friends and family. We will be "officially" signing our marriage certificate on that day. We could not be happier.