Our Beautiful Lesbian Wedding
The first time I met Brigid was the last time I ever questioned what type of person I wanted to be with. She blew me away with her carefree outlook, love for animals and striking beauty. I have always felt she is the perfect dichotomy of strength and femininity. She has taken major blows on the rugby field and loves getting dirty in all these competitive sports but the next minute she displays the most delicate nature and grace.
Having been together since 2002, we have experienced fun and solemn times. Through these experiences, I realize we are always there for each other and was so happy when she asked me to marry her last year.
Brigid was initially nervous about working with wedding vendors, etc for the wedding. She, and admittedly I, were expecting to hear gasps or moments of uncomfortable silence as we called florists, DJs, bakeries, officiants, and other vendors about our wedding.
For the most part there were no problems. It proved to really be a matter of this: as long as my partner and I were confident and comfortable talking about our bridal plans and the fact that it was two women and no groom, the vendors quickly fell into line.
The same went for our guests. The more we talked happily about our upcoming big day the more our co-workers, friends and family became excited and involved. That was the key – being happy and confident. So even when you did run into someone that couldn't process two women walking down the aisle, you had this massive support group that you created by educating them that this is something to be proud of, excited about, and involved in.
Quick tip: We had a year long engagement. We initially asked our parents who they wanted to invite. They all sheepishly declined to invite any of their friends, business partners, etc. As they started to see the reality of the wedding happen, dresses were bought, flowers ordered, a wedding shower was planned, it was like they all of a sudden realized that this was a totally respectable event that deserved every bit of 'showing off' to their friends and relatives as any other wedding. That is when the guest lists hit. My dad added 22 relatives at the last minute. Brigid's step mom wanted to invite friends too. Unfortunately, we had already selected a small venue for the ceremony/reception because it seemed like there would be a very small guest list. Problem.
So…ask your parents 2,3, or 10 times if they want to invite people because the closer the day comes and the more PROUD and CONFIDENT they see you about your upcoming nuptials, they will start to get the guest list itch and regret not initially inviting people.
Brigid and I had a beautiful day for our wedding! One of the coolest things was during a slow song at the reception. Brigid and I looked around and saw our straight friends slow dancing and the gay couples slow dancing. It was really a peaceful thing to see.
We didn't let any 'what if this person doesn't want to see us kiss at the end of the ceremony,' or 'what if my relative thinks my special message in the program is too much.' We just went for it and expressed ourselves the way we wanted. It was an amazing experience and I am excited and honored to step into our future together.